How dark it is behind the scenes of a severe binge eating disorder
If you think it’s all about eating, you’re completely wrong.
As a kid, I have often been told “tu as un bon coup de fourchette” — a common french expression meaning “you are a great eater!” or “it is better to have you in a picture than on the table”!
To the question “would you like some more?”, my answer was always an enthusiastic “yes, please”.
No matter what.
No matter what food it was, no matter how many servings I had eaten, no matter if it was not tasty or not. Salty after sweet. I would always answer “yes”.
I still do.
My life from 2012 to 2017 looked pretty much like chaos. I had already been through food disorders before, gained and lost weight, but never to the point where I am today.
My biggest and fastest weight gain was 15kg in 6 months in 2017, after a painful breakup with my ex-fiancé.
Two years earlier, my dad had passed away after three years of heavy sickness spent in a hospital due to an irreversible stroke. My ghostly relationship with my brother, constant love-hate interactions with my mom kept haunting me with that “what is wrong with me” feeling. Being fired from a job by an abusive boss I…
